James Webster Bennett, Sr.
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December 6, 2018 U.S. Veteran
Burial Date: December 15, 2018 |
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Mr. James Webster Bennett, Sr. 91 of Charlotte,NC. passed away Thursday, December 6,2018 at Sardis Oaks Nursing & Rehab. Center.Wake service will be held Friday, December 14, 2018 at Greater Gethsemane AME Zion Church 531 Campus St. Charlotte, NC 28216 At 6:00 pm until 7:30 pm. The body will lie in state at 11:00 am follow with the service beginning at 12:00 pm. Military rites and Entombment will follow in Sunset Memory Gardens 8901 Lawyers Rd. Charlotte, NC 28227 On September 30, 1927 – an ordinary autumn day in Pee Dee, North Carolina – a baby, JAMES WEBSTER BENNETT – was born to Foy and Anna Bennett. He was the younger of two children. His big sister, Mary Kate, welcomed and loved her new brother for 2 ½ years until she died from pneumonia at the tender age of 9 years. Pee Dee was a small, close knit community in Anson County where he grew up surrounded by extended family on both sides. It was his “little piece of heaven on earth” that always brought him back to basics – to the values, priorities and principles that shaped his character. At age 6, he moved to Norwood, North Carolina in Stanly County where, for five years, his mother’s family influenced him and continued the shaping of the man he was to become. He may have grown up as an only child in Pee Dee but in Norwood, he was “one of the gang”. He flourished not only under the tutelage of his “old school” grandparents but also under the additional (s)mothering of three aunts and the ribbing of two uncles. When he returned to Pee Dee, he had developed a love of math, cultivated an interest in bookkeeping and finances and was familiar with the activities of managing a household.
Dad was nurtured/encouraged/directed to make a difference in his life and in the lives of others. He accepted it as an obligation to (1) trust God to direct and intervene in his life, (2) take advantage of opportunities presented to him and (3) “see” beyond the challenges of the moment – no matter how tough the moments were. Sensing that his nurturing and training in Pee Dee had prepared him to move beyond his comfort zone and meet the challenges of the outside world, he completed the following over his lifetime: served in the United States Army, worked at a local business after returning home from the military in a role typically not reserved for blacks in Anson County, graduated from A & T State University with a BS degree in Industrial Vocation Education and an MS degree in Industrial Arts Education. These degrees prepared him to excel in teaching Math and Industrial Arts in local junior high and high schools in three school systems in North Carolina: Pender County, Rowan County and Mecklenburg County. He completed further advanced studies at North Carolina State University and Wake Forest University in vocational education and math-related topics. He retired twice from the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools. He left Quail Hollow Junior High in 1987 but accepted the invitation to teach at South Mecklenburg High where he finally retired in 1989.
Dad was a quiet, introspective man. In fact, when he raised his voice, everyone around him knew that something was clearly amiss. He didn’t chatter, use words loosely or misrepresent himself or his intentions by his words. He would NEVER have been considered the life of a party; he was too serious for that. LOTS of thoughts were constantly in his head but he shared only the best and most practically applicable ones in open forum.
Dad loved many things – photography, woodworking, building projects, outdoor / yard / gardening activities. He loved cooking, travelling, driving, organizing his “junk” and periodically updating the vehicles he drove. He loved watching the TV program, “Shark Tank.”
From his youth, Dad learned to serve and honor God in the A.M.E. Zion church. Whether he served at Centenary in Pee Dee in whatever capacity was needed, or Moore’s Chapel in Salisbury on the Steward Board and as Boy Scout advisor, or Greater Gethsemane in Charlotte as Steward Board Chairman / Pastor’s Steward (which he described as a full-time job), he served with all his might knowing that he answered to God first and then to his fellow man.
Dad’s network of organizational friends and associates was important to him. He loved his brothers in Phi Beta Sigma fraternity. He especially loved his lodge brothers and the roles he served within those organizations through the years:
Dad valued the people he knew and met from all walks of life. He especially honored the relationships he had with his friends. He could be counted on to maintain confidences and confidentiality; he expected the same in return. There are many he counted among friends, loved ones, fellow employees, organizational buddies, even casual associates who will miss his smiling face, quiet disposition and positive demeanor.
Dad loved his children – Cynthia, Jimmy (James Jr.) and Broderick – and raised all three of us to adulthood. He knew how to actively instruct, guide and influence us. His lessons were so clear and unmistakable that we knew better than to disobey his mandates. Even though he could be fun-loving, he believed in applying consequences and repercussions when he needed to do so. There were many times when he needed to do so. In addition, he recognized that missed moments in rearing children were the same as lost moments. As a result, he spent LOTS of time parenting and was present at activities where we performed to “cheer us on.” Even as he continued to age, he seemed to never stop “fathering”. He found plenty of opportunities to add “just one more thing” and with the passing of time those nuggets of counsel seemed more valuable and appreciated than when he shared them with us during our youth. He welcomed our spouses into his “big tent” and LOVED the ever-expanding family that resulted. Jimmy and Denise blessed him with Jamie and Johnathan, Broderick and Emogene blessed him with Keith and Danielle, and Cynthia and Reginald blessed him with Cynthia and Reginald James. Even though Broderick preceded him in death in 2001, Keith and Danielle continued to keep their father’s memory strong in ways both known and unknown to them. Jamie and Josh gave Dad bragging rights to talk about his 3 great grandchildren and at Thanksgiving, Keith and Shannon gave him bragging rights to talk about the newest addition expected in the summer of 2019.
There was NO ONE he loved more than “Miss Bea”. Their years of growing up together in Pee Dee made it possible for Dad and Beatrice Frye to get to know each other – their personalities, families, likes, dislikes and especially the quirky things that “make” and “break” relationships. They had plenty of time to learn each other’s habits, preferences and priorities. Years later after they were married in 1953, their interests, hobbies and habits seemed so similar, they often appeared as “two peas in a pod.” In reality, their personalities were complete opposites.
Relationship management was one of Dad’s strongest points. He learned to manage their differences and use those differences to the advantage of the relationship. In areas that were tough to mitigate, he spoiled her and pampered her – with great results!
Mom and Dad lived well together for many years – weathering the good and bad times and always coming out stronger as a result. However, about 20 years ago, it became apparent that something was wrong. “Miss Bea” ultimately was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and began the slow mental decline that ravages its victims. At a time when it would have been easy to put her away, Dad embarked on the battle of his life – to take care of her – “for better or for worse” as stated in the wedding vows he had voiced to her decades earlier. For years, he was attentive to and protective of EVERYTHING associated with her. From his sick bed and ultimately from his death bed, he dictated policies, made decisions, expressed preferences and secured commitments for Mom’s care and well-being. Comfortable that he had made appropriate accommodations for the love of his life and satisfied that all was well between him and God, he went to sleep on December 6, 2018.
A few years ago when asked how he wanted to be remembered, Dad thought about it and calmly indicated that he wanted to be remembered as Helpful, Industrious and Pragmatic. What a typical “Dad” response. He didn’t want popular things like fanfare, glitz or glamour. He wanted the reassurance that he had been of service to God and man. He was an ordinary man who lived an extraordinary life.
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